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- Editor’s
Note:
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- This
column is a regular feature in the Wayback Times in which my
husband takes interesting people out to lunch … and sends
me the bill.
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- (It's
a tough job, but someone has to do it!)
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- Send
us an e-mail if you have someone in mind for one of Peter Neilly's
interviews over lunch.
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- Peter Neilly is Out
to Lunch
- Breaking bread with
interesting people
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- Out to Lunch!
- with Peter Neilly
- This Out to Lunch column does not involve an interview over
lunch, but is a tribute to the fascinating life of Jay (James
Deans) Telfer, who died May 20.
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- Most regular readers of the Wayback Times knew of Jay as
the original owner and editor of this paper, but he was much
more than that. Jay led a fascinating life, overcame more challenges
and accomplished more successes n his very interesting 61 years
than most people would ever dream of doing.
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- Jay Telfer
- 1947-2009
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- Sandy and I first met Jay when we started advertising our
antique shop in his paper almost 13 years ago. Out of that first
meeting grew a friendship and admiration for Jay that eventually
led to us purchasing the Wayback Times from him in the fall of
2006.
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- Jay had many health-related setbacks in his life. As a teenager
in the '60s, he battled cancer, and at age 37 he suffered a massive
stroke. In the spring of 2000, he underwent bypass surgery.
He fought addictions during his life and had just completed 23
years of being addiction free. Jay handled adversities that hopefully
none of us will ever have to face, and he always battled back.
Throughout all his time in and out of hospitals, he kept a positive
outlook and kept working on his dreams.
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- At Jay's memorial service, his brother, Ian Telfer, president
and CEO of Goldcorp Inc., gave a touching account of Jay's all-too-short
life.
"Jay dared to dream, but unlike most of us who dare to dream,
Jay dared to act on his dreams," said Ian. "Most of
us have a fear of the unknown, but Jay was fearless when it came
to following his dreams."
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 As a teen, Jay quit
school to follow his dream of becoming a successful musician.
He became an integral part of the Yorkville musical scene in
the 1960s and his band, A Passing Fancy, went on tour and recorded
a successful album with Columbia Records.
I remember watching them perform at the Canadian National Exhibition
where they played their hit song I Believe In Sunshine.
- Jay then went on to a solo career and recorded several hit
songs, as well as writing for other artists. His song Ten Pound
Note became a huge hit for the band Steel River.
Jay was also the drummer on Murray Mclaughlan's debut album,
Songs From The Street, and was the guitarist in the Toronto production
of the musical Hair that played at the Royal Alex.
As Jay's brother mentioned, "Jay had the coolest address
in Toronto in the 1960s, No. 1 Yorkville Ave."
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- His next dream was to become a successful screenwriter, so
he simply got into his van and drove to California, where he
became, you guessed it, an award-winning screenwriter.
Jay was married briefly to movie star Bonnie Bedelia, who starred
with Bruce Willis in the Die Hard series as his wife.
And while living in Los Angeles, Jay wrote the script for the
movie Kid Vengeance, starring Jim Brown and Lee Van Cleef.
Jay also wrote for CTV's Search and Rescue and managed to complete
a novel, Business as Usual.
After returning to Toronto, Jay wrote scripts for both CBC Radio
and television shows and was nominated in 1981 for writing the
CBC's three-part teledrama You've Come A Long Way, Katie, which
was about addiction.
- Jay's next dream was to get into the hospitality business,
so he moved to Wellington, Ontario, and in 1990 opened Jay's
Bed and Breakfast.
In 1995, while vacationing in Minnesota with his wife, Cindy,
Jay decided it would be a great idea to start up an antique newspaper
and a 12-page November/December issue of the Wayback Times was
born that same year.
Jay sold the ads, designed the layout, edited the copy and once
published, delivered thousands of papers to antique shops and
shows across Ontario.
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- Even as Jay's health worsened, his creative juices kept flowing.
Just last year, he became a financial backer of the award-winning
documentary Prom Night In Mississippi, which was featured at
the Sundance Film Festival and is about to be released worldwide.
It is about Charleston High School in Mississippi, which, until
2008, had segregated proms for blacks and whites until Academy
Award winning actor Morgan Freeman offered to pay for an integrated
prom. His original offer in 1997 was refused.
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- Among Jay's many interests was his passion for all things
VW, especially Volkswagen Beetles. This was another common bond
that we could relate to as our son, Aaron, shared the same obsession.
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- There was a friendly rivalry between Jay and Aaron as their
collections increased in size and value. From vintage Dinky Toys
and advertising, to boxing shorts and edible chocolate VWs, no
item was ever passed up when discovered.
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- When Jay recently sold his collection due to his health and
smaller living quarters, he donated all of the proceeds to the
Canadian Hunger Foundation, an organization he greatly admired.
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- So it was no surprise at his memorial service to see Jay's
ashes were in a jar that was a VW Beetle replica. We knew he
would be well pleased with this fitting gesture, acknowledging
both his passion and his great sense of humour.
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 At the conclusion
of Jay's memorial service, a piece written by a pastor in the
1990s was read. It shares a message we can all benefit from:
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- "Remember; spend some time with your loved ones, because
they are not going to be around forever.
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- Remember, say a kind word to someone who looks up to you
in awe, because that little person soon will grow up and leave
your side.
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- Remember, to give a warm hug to the one next to you, because
that is the only treasure you can give with your heart and it
doesn't cost a cent.
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- Remember, to say, 'I love you' to your partner and your loved
ones, but most of all mean it. A kiss and an embrace will mend
hurt when it comes from deep inside of you.
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- Remember to hold hands and cherish the moment, for someday
that person will not be there again.
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- Give time to love, give time to speak! And give time to share
the precious thoughts in your mind.
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- And always remember:
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- Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but
by the moments that take our breath away."
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- Jay will be missed by many of us.
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